friction

Well, the other morning, I got booted out of the car wash

They have "Free Vacuums" there, but apparently, they are not really free. I was driving a loaner car—a soft-top convertible—that didn't need to go through the wash, but it definitely needed to be vacuumed out before I returned it.

I did my due diligence. I spoke to the little fella monitoring the intake at the very outset. I asked him, "Vacuums free?" He said, "Vacuums are free."

Well, twenty-ish minutes later, before I was finished, that same guy came over and asked me to leave because he thought I was taking too long. Great.

After that, I go over to the gas station to fill up said loaner car before it goes back. I have to use the app to put in a rotating code to get the five-cent fuel savings—savings I question if they are worth the hassle every time because I always mess it up. I fat finger the keypad. My phone doesn’t load the app. etc. It’s always something.

The poor cashier looked like she was ready to grab me by the ear, drag me out of the gas station, and leave me on the curb.

It is hard sometimes to just go out and do things. The thing I think I want sometimes, is to be a person of absolutely no resistance. I don't want to cause anybody any sort of trouble. I don't want to cause friction. I want to be totally passive.

You can’t be that though. 

There's always going to be some rub. Maybe the app won't load, or you're taking too long with the vacuums to get what you need done. And like, you gotta do stuff. You have to exist and existing means friction of some level in every relationship.

I don't think I was crossing any major lines the other morning. It's just that I was taking a minute or a few seconds longer than somebody else might have. But to me, in that moment, it feels like the end of the world.

You can't move forward without pushing against something. It feels uncomfortable, but if you want the car clean and the tank full, you’re gonna have to take up a little space in line.